Wednesday, August 29, 2012

IDIOT.

Hey ya little jambalayas. 

Do you think that pet name works? Lately I've really been into trying new endearments. Like "ya little dumpling" or "ya big lug" but something tells me "little jambalayas" is just a little too weird. Wonk wonk.

Anyway - 

I realized something today. Had a revelation, if you will, while I was working. Beneath my sheer exhaustion and GREAT hair (I kid) and thinning patience at work, I realized I am a complete and bona-fide idiot. 

Did I already say "wonk wonk?" Well I'm going to say it again. WONK WONK.

I already blogged last post about how I'm a hypocrite. Now I'm going to blog about how I'm an idiot. So for anyone just joining me, PLEASE DON'T THINK ALL MY BLOGS ARE JUST ABOUT HATING ON MYSELF. That's silly and untrue and no, I don't need to read the latest article in ELLE magazine about how much ass I kick as a 21st century gal. I already know I kick a lot of 21st century ass. But I can be an idiotic ass-kicking modern woman, can't I? 

It all comes back to the workplace. I think your true colors come out at work. Because when you're at your place of employment, you are stretched thin and your patience is tested and you're tired and you don't get the recognition you are SO SURE YOU DESERVE and dang flabbit that girl only got that promotion because she's pretty and has huge boobs BLAH BLAH BLAH. The list goes on and on. At every single job I have ever had, I have learned that I can be really, really rude to people and I am so ashamed of this. Sometimes I have a moment where it could bring me to my knees and I lean back and think, "If Jesus were here, right now, standing beside me, would he be proud of his daughter?"

The crazy contradiction of it all is that JESUS ACTUALLY IS RIGHT THERE AND I DON'T THINK HE'D BE VERY PROUD OF ME. 

I deal with a lot of people at my job. It's a people kind of job and I love it and I am so thankful and it is so humbling. It causes me to stand back and really, really think about how I can reflect Christ to the people I meet. I am constantly coming in contact with people from all over the U.S. and all over the world. It is an amazing gift that I can way too easily take for granted. But every so often you meet someone who is just so tender and so sweet and it makes it all worth it. Like today I had a blind gentleman kiss my hand simply because I told him I was Puerto Rican too. He was so happy homeboy KISSED MY HAND, OLD-SCHOOL CHIVALRIC, JIMMY STEWART STYLE. I was so taken aback and so flattered. It wasn't creepy. It wasn't weird. It was so lovely and then I got to walk with him across the street and it just left my heart so full. 

And I realized I can't only be nice to the NICE people. That's easy. Jesus wasn't just nice to his disciples and those who followed him. Jesus didn't even come to be "nice." He came to SAVE. To save real souls, real people, real lives. That is huge and revolutionary. 

I work with people everyday. People with real souls and real hearts. And it's really easy to shrug them off and get annoyed and all of that. But I have to remember that just like God created me in a unique way, God created everyone - He can count the hairs on all of our heads...He knit us together in our mother's WOMB for gosh sakes!!! 

God knows when I'm short and snippy to someone. God knows when I even think short and snippy thoughts. So Lord, this is my prayer: I don't want to think like that anymore. I don't want to think I'm better than anyone because NEWS FLASH 

I'M NOT. 

And you're not either. I don't care if you have a Master's Degree, if you get paid six figures, if you buy your clothes at artsy freaking thrift stores and journal in a moleskin and like only Wes Anderson films - YOU, ME, ALL OF US - we are not better than one another. 

So let's just love each other, mmmk?! That's like such an old-school hippie idea but it's legit. 

Galatians 5:13  For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 

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