I am a bad b-u-t-t
I am a bad butt
I’m so bad I won’t even CUSS, you won’t hear those words starting in my gut
Crawling up through my ribcage and spreading their VENOM cause
I am so cool,
Cussing is below me.
I eat unrinsed strawberries cuz PESTACIDES don’t own me!
I take my coffee either black or with so much sugar I give myself cavities
I wait for my mail so the mailman’s confused and wonders what issue does this girl have with me?
Yeah I cuddle with my cat and he ain’t even declawed
And heck yes I drive at the speed limit, I’m so badbutt I refuse to break the law
Yeah I go to Goodwill with my Grandma which makes me badder than those hipsters
Who rep Brooklyn with their TOMS and keychains big framed glasses make them wish for
Something so vintage like a senior citizen Wednesday afternoon discount
So I get my jeans at 1.50 as I badbutt two-step off the sidewalk drop a nice dismount.
I blare Ke$ha and Gaga in my car cause those girls are so deep
True artists they know of the world’s suffering and deceit
I go through yellow lights and ignore the hater’s beeps
Heck YES I pick up my little sister from school at 2:30 p – m
And sometimes at nighttime I think she might be my only friend…
But that doesn’t matter because I am a bad b-u-t-t
I finished college at NYU heck, I got my Bachelor’s Degree
I destroyed that deans list walked away with a 4.0
I’m so bad I wear clothes that cover me up and skin I just don’t show
Me and my friend saw TANGLED in the movies in the middle of the day
And I cried when they sang that duet on the boat and I’m STILL okay!
I’m so bad I even go to church every Sunday and I LIKE it
I drive myself too because heck I gotta LISCENSE
I drink diet coke at a club because drunk people smell and sometimes scare me,
I listen to musicals before I go out with my friends, people say turn it off and I’m like, DARE ME!
I like that reading Narnia in an air conditioned room is my idea of a beautiful moment,
and when my IPOD comes on shuffle you hear old school Nelly tracks & the soundtrack to Atonement
People say I’m weird but I’m like….you’re weird?
People say it’s embarrassing, but I’m like…no fear!
I feel my heart pat pat against my chest in the middle of the night,
My own mortality astonishes me and I think it’s an ever-losing fight
To claw – rip – shred against the world’s views of what I should be molded to be
Bad – cool – rebellious –
Adjectives that are the very opposite of me
So as the seconds minutes wander and tick slowly quickly by
I’ll just relax into the arms of God and let out a contented sigh
Because even though the world says I’m not cool enough, I’m free
to be satisfied in the knowledge that I’m the only me.