Thursday, February 17, 2011

dry seasons

I think I've been in a bit of a writer's block when it comes to blogging. I switched to this cute new blog and now I'm like--blegh. Nothing. Nada. I don't know why that is....well, actually I was sick for four days in a row and now I'm feeling much better, but when you're sick you really don't want to do anything but sit there and just...zone out. Anyway.
In my devotional today it said: "My love for you is constant and is not to be reckoned by your own happiness or unhappiness." I thought that was pretty remarkable. This past month has been an emotional and spiritual rollercoaster. It's definitely exciting, but also there have been times of not-so-wonderful things.  And reading this in my devotional today made me pause for a moment and really think about what that sentence means. Okay. God loves me--that's easy enough to say a few times and begin to grasp. So how come when I'm feeling super down, or even bored with my life, do I so easily let go of the joy that comes with being a child of God?
It's crazy to think that a love can be so constant. It's kind of like the love I have from my family. I know my mom and sisters and dad will always love me no matter what. There's absolutely not question about it--it's so deeply ingrained inside of me that I never really worry about if they love me or not. So why can't I understand this about God so much?
It's crazy, because in life doesn't everyone just want constant love. Like, isn't that why dating is so freaking scary? Why being in a romantic relationship with someone is such a risk? Because really, there is that chance that one day the other person (or yourself) could wake up and BAM. Done. It's just not there anymore. That's--really scary. But also it's really awesome because loving is a risk. One of my favorite poems was shown to me by a good friend of mine a few months back:

"It is a risk to love.
But what if it doesn't work out?
Ah, but what if it does."
--Peter McWilliams

Beautiful, right? That little poem is awesome and I love that outlook. Love really is a risk--except with God. I don't know if I'm really articulating what I'm trying to say, but what I feel is that God will ALWAYS love us. Always. I think about how my heart aches when someone I love hurts me--imagine the ache of God? He loves every single person on the earth--imagine the pain of his heart when people turn away from him?

I don't knowwhat the point of this post is, I was just drawn to that one sentence in my devotional. I'm also reading 1 John and it says-- (1 John 3:1) "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!"

That really is great! Every day of my life I should wake up with joy in my heart and ask God excitedly, "What do you have for me today, Lord?! How can I follow your will today?!" That's pretty exciting.

Anyway, in writing this I decided what I want the next post to be about! And now I'm really happy. I guess it's always good to just work through writer's block. Hope everyone is enjoying this beautiful weather. It's the perfect day to listen to some Avett or Mumford, huh? Kinda makes me want to listen to some banjo.

Love & Sunny Skies with a Cool Breeze and a Banjo Playing in the Distance,
Nina

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